Masking or burnout?

2021.09.20 03:20 violet_mildliner Masking or burnout?

It’s important to note that I’m not diagnosed with autism and that this may not be related at all, I just have been suspecting that it could be a possibility that I have it.
The last 2 days I’ve been really overwhelmed and last night I feel like I kind of shut down in a way, but not “fully.” Earlier today, I had a breakdown when I was already trying so hard to focus on the work I was doing while it was so loud and bright in my room and nothing seemed to help me drown at least some of it out. It was bound to happen, but it was triggered by an anxiety attack on top of what I was already feeling. I’m now in a state where I feel almost void and full at the same time spoken unless I absolutely have to, and even then it’s very quiet. It’s kind of hurts to speak and it’s extremely exhausting to speak or even make a whole lot of facial expressions. This isn’t the first time I’ve ever felt like this, but it’s a while. I used to hardly speak a year ago for like 2 years, but I’ve spoken a lot more recently these past 2 years. It’s almost like I finally get to be in my own head again like I was before. I quite like not speaking honestly, but it’s also exhausting knowing that I’m going to have to.
I don’t feel like I need to or really can give a lot of reaction to what’s going on around me, and I’ve noticed that when i do speak, it’s pretty monotonous naturally, but I have to gather a lot of energy to use inflection so that I don’t annoy the people I’m talking to or get asked if I’m okay.
I was wondering if this might be what it feels like when you stop masking; however, I do know this is personal and I don’t want to make it seem like I’m asking this question as if I’m asking for somebody to tell me yes or no. I was just wondering if anybody else has felt this way when they don’t mask as much—I just feel at peace like this even though I know that it’ll be a disadvantage when I’m not by myself. I’ve recently come to the conclusion that almost everything that I do and say, especially when I’m with people outside of my family, is completely mirrored and/or “taken” from what I’ve observed on a level that isn’t normal and that I don’t feel like I know how I’m naturally inclined to act.
I was wondering if this is what burnout might feel liek for some people as well.
I hope that these questions make sense and don’t bother anybody :)
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2021.09.20 03:20 Sativa-Serenity My husband got me chocolate and flowers! My favorite! I feel so loved.

My husband got me chocolate and flowers! My favorite! I feel so loved. submitted by Sativa-Serenity to weed [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 03:20 Adventurous-List5412 CPO - Recent Purchase Question

Purchased ‘17 330i which was still under original 4 year warranty and had 2 months left. That expired 9/1/21. Just noticed in the myBMW app it shows active for CPO coverage for 60mo 9/1/22. Didn’t sign anything indicating so safe to assume this is coverage from the previous owner that won’t transfer over since car was purchased from dealer?
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2021.09.20 03:20 WantToStayAnonymous9 Horrible sleep habits 😪

So long story short I have very bad sleep habits caused by anxiety and adhd and have had to smoke a ridiculous amount of weed to go to sleep at a decent hour. I could count the days on two hands that I have not smoked anything to go to sleep in the last 10 years. Fastforward to recently about a week ago I quit smoking weed because I have been going through a pretty rough time in my life and battling depression. And felt it was doing more harm than benefit for me. I felt like it ruined my life in alot of ways. So I quit cold turkey . But honestly this last week has been rough. Smoking weed to calm me down throughout the day and before i to go to sleep is almost embedded in me. Work and my personal life is almost impossible to get through because my anxiety and adhd feel like there almost amplified by 100x. Then to top it all off I can still only seem to get 2 hours sleep. It makes it really hard because it really is impossible for me to go to sleep or even get close to calming or relaxing until hours like 3 or 4 in the morning. I have tried lots of stuff to try and calm myself . Warm showers, midnight jogs, 1am workouts , melatonin inside natural sleeping tea. But nothing seems to calm me...except weed.. Any tips or suggestions to how I can get back to normal? And any ways to curb my anxiety and adhd without medication?
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2021.09.20 03:20 topredditbot Contractor in Colorado Destroys His Own Work After Not Getting Payed [r/PublicFreakout by u/Paper_chasers]

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2021.09.20 03:20 Kathytrithardt Weekly Wrap Up!!

Weekly Wrap Up!! submitted by Kathytrithardt to booktube [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 03:20 Wide-Flounder5317 I think I broke Mikey

I think I broke Mikey submitted by Wide-Flounder5317 to TokyoRevengers [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 03:20 ram-da-man Who wins

View Poll
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2021.09.20 03:20 hikerunner TZ Crack #3, Stillwater Canyon MT on top rope this summer with a couple of the friends I made while working in the area

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2021.09.20 03:20 spazmcnasty I need a gif... I need John gruden from the game against the steelers saying "are we gonna fucking play"

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2021.09.20 03:20 Any_Bumblebee966 4/21

Aries rising Taurus sun Capricorn moon really hungry no food Local food bank is closed until Tuesday just want a meal I figured I would try it worst that I can get is a no
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2021.09.20 03:20 angryseal1999 How can I force myself to finish a real meal?

I have no idea how I got into this habit, but I don't really eat a lot. And I've noticed that I have a really hard time finishing meals and just want to snack. It almost feels like I'm bored with my food. I've noticed it's easier for me to eat a "meal" that's a little bit of everything. Like a charcuterie board for example. I can finish the entirety of those because there's variety. But I could not sit down tonight and finish my bowl of chili for the life of me because I got bored of it. Then I ate some crackers and cheese and that was fine for me. I could eat a lot. How can I get back into the habit of being able to finish a full meal no matter what it is?
Because I know just wanting to snack probably isn't good for me. 😂 Especially when I don't eat a lot in general.
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2021.09.20 03:20 MtnMamaAsh Universal Restrooms

Restrooms in general are a nightmare with young toddlers. From the crawling on the dirty floor, to trying to peek under stalls, or the sheer panic and vulnerability you feel when your toddler discovers the simple slide lock on the door.
It had me thinking, what on Earth am I going to do when public restrooms become universal? In my opinion, men’s restrooms tend to be dirtier (the floors anyway), and the new added obstacle of a urinal (facinating to littles I’m sure, bonus points if there’s a bright blue cleaning puck in it), and also, walking past men who are actively peeing with my curious toddler.
I’m just wondering if anyone else has thoughts on this? I’m 100% supportive of everyone feeling accepted and able to go where they feel most comfortable, I’m just not sure how to navigate it.
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2021.09.20 03:20 cay-os Can anxiety tics include complex and simple vocal tics?

Can anxiety tics include vocal tics?
looking for further information because I have had tics that I am aware of at least a year and they could be linked to anxiety.
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2021.09.20 03:20 Careless_Rub_7996 When is Marvel VS Capcom 2 going to come out for ps4?!

I been seeing rumors recently about MvC 2 coming to PS4. But, why is this taking soo long? Among other PS2 TO PS3 Classics?
I still think this is one of the BEST fighting games out there, although I do prefer MvC 1 fighting style, but non the less MVC 2 is still fun. Will it ever come out on the PS Store?
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2021.09.20 03:20 Hot-Carrot9 What's the worst way you've accidentally killed a pet?

I'm at a bar no idea how this happened but so far we have not feeding a fish, leaving a hamster on top of a dryer it got shook to death, and wrong heat lamp burnt a turtle
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2021.09.20 03:20 SSolo87 ITT Tech Borrower's Defense Question Clarification

Like many, I received an email on 09/07/2021 that my borrowers defense application was approved for student loan discharge (YAY!) though, I'm still waiting for an update as of this writing. As most of you have probably read, the borrowers defense does not cover FFELP and private loans. I've read maybe 2x dozen articles online that reiterate this. Only Federal Direct loans covered under the William D. Ford Direct Loan program. Though the email received certainly causes some confusion for me. See below for an except from the email.
"Will all of my federal loans be discharged?

This borrower defense to repayment discharge by the Department does not apply to private student loans. Therefore, nothing in this email applies to any private student loans that you may have. This email only applies to the federal student loans that you received for the programs of study related to your approved claim."
So, will my FFEL/FFELP loans be discharged or not? I have about $30K in FFEL loans owned by the Dept of ED through Navient ($26K in Direct). I read else where that you can consolidate the FFEL/FFELP loans into a Direct Consolidation loan to have those loans discharged. Then again, I also read another article that if you proceed to do so, you forfeit any right for loan cancellation and borrowers benefits. I'm so confused but also anxious and paranoid that I won't receive 100% relief. Thank You!
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2021.09.20 03:20 Ok-Floor-1217 Im having a hard tine figuring out my comp 😖 can someone help 💔

Im having a hard tine figuring out my comp 😖 can someone help 💔 submitted by Ok-Floor-1217 to CookieRunKingdoms [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 03:20 EntitledTrapper 3 Days Tourists…

Grab your 9mm, an ar or two and your best shooting skills, cuz you have 3 days to prepare!
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2021.09.20 03:20 ihoardcoconutwater How bad would it be to keep the baby

I don't know if it's residual guilt over my past abortion or if I should, the father is willing to be a part of its life if I keep it, but also am not sure if I can trust him. Started as a fling but we have been on/off again. He is also not OK mentally and I don't always feel safe we fight alot but I think raising a baby it would be better if the baby had a father rather than not having him. I grew up without my mother and I know it left a void
I feel like I have been so hopeless and a child might give me purpose or make life make sense and I know that's a wrong feeling to have but I feel like I could be a good mother, I could try really hard, I don't know if it would be wrong to be a mother because of my BPD. I have been thinking back and forth with the question can I be a good mother, is it even possible to be a good mother being a borderline in the first place. I don't want to traumatize a child or bring them into a world where they can be hurt but I think I could protect them from that and I think I could be a good mother. I have a relative who will support my decision and be there if I do keep the baby so I won't be a mother alone either
Are there any mothers here who can give any input? I am desperate
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2021.09.20 03:20 ClarkWGriswold31 Nothing like a good blanket

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2021.09.20 03:20 csummerss Rondale Moore through two games vs. Andy Isabella’s entire rookie season.

Andy Isabella:

Rondale Moore:
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2021.09.20 03:20 Brohobojoe Gentlemen,

a short view back to the past. Thirty years ago, Niki Lauda told us ‘take a monkey, place him into the cockpit and he is able to drive the car.’ Thirty years later, Sebastian told us ‘I had to start my car like a computer, it’s very complicated.’ And Nico Rosberg said that during the race – I don’t remember what race - he pressed the wrong button on the wheel. Question for you both: is Formula One driving today too complicated with twenty and more buttons on the wheel, are you too much under effort, under pressure? What are your wishes for the future concerning the technical programme during the race? Less buttons, more? Or less and more communication with your engineers?
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2021.09.20 03:20 CourseDangerous2583 I need some explanations here

I need some explanations here submitted by CourseDangerous2583 to summonerswar [link] [comments]